Navigating Teen Relationships: Friends

Teen Relationship Email Series Click Here

Teen Leadership Cohort Click Here

The podcast link to This is So Awkward 

Welcome to "Leaders of Today: Teens to Titans," the podcast where we explore how to empower our youth to become the leaders of tomorrow. Let's dive into a topic that every parent of a teenager will find incredibly relevant—teen friendships. This episode kicks off a new series dedicated to understanding and supporting the ever-changing social lives of our teens.

When our kids become teenagers, their friendships change dramatically. Kids who were once close friends may drift apart, while new connections form. The onset of "mean girl" behavior and other social dynamics can be overwhelming for both teens and parents alike. As parents, it can be frustrating to feel off base when we try to share our observations about their friendships. It’s tough to resist the urge to say, “It’s your life, deal with the consequences,” especially when we end up comforting them after a friend betrays their trust. It’s a challenging time for them and for us as parents.

So, what can we do? My best advice is to be a listener and show genuine curiosity about what’s happening in their social lives. One activity I find particularly helpful in my program is creating personal webs with the teens.

Every time we do this activity, teens often come back and say, “Wow, I had no idea I had such a [positive/negative] relationship with this person. When I did my web, it was so clear to me.” Teens generally know who is good for them and who is toxic, but it’s hard to admit mistakes in relationships at this age. Seeing these dynamics laid out on paper can be incredibly eye-opening. It’s either a reality check or a confirmation of how lucky they are.

The activity involves creating a web that links everyone in their lives. I encourage teens to take a day or two to complete this, as they may not remember everyone at once. As they go through their daily routine, they recall people on the periphery of their lives. Once the web is complete, we evaluate each relationship for positive or negative qualities.

We pick two different colors to represent positive and negative qualities. For example, let’s use red and green. We assess each relationship based on several qualities:

• Power:
  • Red for relationships where there’s a power imbalance (either they have power over someone or someone has power over them).
  • Green for equal power dynamics.

There are other qualities we evaluate in the activity, but this is a great starting point for your teen to see what types of relationships they have.

I also encourage you, as a parent, to create your own web and share your findings with your teen. This can open the door to meaningful conversations about relationships. By being a listener, showing curiosity, and using tools like the personal web activity, we can help our teens navigate their friendships more effectively. This approach not only helps them identify positive and toxic relationships but also fosters open communication between you and your teen.

And here's something exciting—this episode is just the beginning of a new series on navigating teen relationships! To stay updated and receive all the resources we’ll be sharing, including detailed guides and activities, make sure to join our email series. You can find the link to join in the show notes.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Leaders of Today: Teens to Titans." If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with other parents who might benefit from this conversation. Together, we can support our teens in building healthy, positive relationships and becoming the leaders of tomorrow.